What attracts younger men to older women? It’s a question many people ask themselves when they see a ‘cougar’ with her ‘cub.’
Research reveals the number of younger men dating older women is a growing trend. And it seems as though there is a good reason for it. In short, age-gap relationship between younger men and older women are better for mental health.
It’s no secret that relationships can throw up one nonsensical crisis after another. For some men, these dramas are too much to bear. Explosive relationships can damage your mental health.
Some men seek out mature women because they are calmer, grounded and emotionally stable. Experienced women are more comfortable with their appearance and have learned to accept themselves. There’s less fuss and shyness.
In contrast, younger women are still fighting with the world. They don’t really know how where they fit in and often have a perception of how they should look to be more appealing to men.
It is this unknowing that creates stress – and stress eventually explodes into an uncontrollable outburst. Romantic relationships supercharge emotions and false perceptions trigger arguments that needn’t have to happen.
Older Women Are Calmer and Worldly-Wise
Mature women typically have a better idea of what they want from life. This knowing blossoms into calmness and the ability to make decisions at the right moments.
In many cases, experience has also taught women how to have intelligent and interesting conversations men actually want to listen to. Whilst girls in their ’20s and ’30s have more sex appeal, many fail to intellectually stimulate their partner.
The slower pace of life is also more appealing than what reckless energy-charged girls want. Some men prefer to go for dates in ambient environments where they can have a meaningful conversation or listen to cultured music like jazz or classical.
A 2016 study showed that younger men are given more confidence and self-esteem when they are shown attention by older women. Their experience and penchant for care help younger men mature more quickly, both emotionally and psychologically.
Mental and Emotional Support
Mothering instincts in girls can start at an early age. The child that plays house or doctors and nurses from an early age is simply displaying the female instinct for care and nurturing.
Most women will retain this instinct as they get older. Some never lose it and it bodes them well in relationships with younger men – especially if the guy is not domesticated and needs to be taken care of.
It is widely accepted in psychology that men subconsciously seek out their mother in a wife. Known as “mommy syndrome,” a boy that lacks maternal bonding as a child will look for a solid and stable partner as an adult.
Older women can therefore fill the emotional void a man did not receive as a child. This healing of a buried wound comes as a psychological release that improves mental health.
The value that older women bring to a relationship is becoming recognized. There is a growing pool of men in their 20’s and 30’s that exclusively date older women and has led to a rise in niche dating sites that specifically match age-gap couples.
Perhaps it’s time for society to change its views on age-gap couples and recognize the benefits instead. With mental health issues on the rise, a lot of psychological solutions can be resolved in the company you keep.